Beautifully Impaired Lyrics

It's 4 AM and I can't get to sleep
Ain't got the patience to be counting sheep
And dreaming's just another task to complete
And give to my teacher for a grade

My mind's like open close machinery
It don't stop to celebrate the scenery
And I can tell tomorrow's sure to be
Another math test of a day

Where no matter how I try
My score is never high
And the time just passes by like empty lines across the page
I'm an empty page

Well me I'm sending out my own police
The president sends troops into the Middle East
I guess we'll both kill in the name of peace
Well goddamn it feels a lot like war

So now we're either terrorists or war machines
And we try to fit the world into our TV screens
Me I'm adding labels to my own daydreams
That I tuck safely in a drawer

Sometimes it seems like they get lost inside
The horizon of the endless cage I live inside
Other times it crushes in so tight my walls collide
Pinning all my hopes and dreams down on the floor

Sometimes I wish I could just let 'em out
It don't help when I'm politely speaking out
So now all I can do is scream it out
Like I've never done before

Like my voice alone could lift me from these bars
Stop picking scabs off my own scars
I turn my back to shining stars and the comfort of the moon
My pain's concealed, like knives could heal these wounds

Now I'm walking on a balance beam
A soldier aims his gun to keep me playing mean
I know I'm two feet from the ground, but in my mind it seems
Like the earth's ten thousand feet below


But then the truth should come as no surprise
The soldier's gun is just a simple disguise
'Cause when you look deep into those tearful eyes
You see his dream of letting go

Cause I can struggle, I can fight
I can try to get it right
I can box my mind in tight, but lord I never feel the breeze
I cry a song, I fall down on my knees

Like a soldier trying to leave his wicked past behind
I put my weapons to the ground, but I'm still running blind
Looking for the strength to face this damn oppressive mind
Tugging at its leash to carry me away

So I know sometimes I fuck up on these tasks for you
And I try to hide these scars behind a mask for you
But the blood is there, and all I know to ask of you
Is that you love me anyway

But their eyes can melt my burning heart to cold again
And I'm competing, working, striving for the gold again
Sometimes I wish that I were six months old again
And I wouldn't need to work to earn my love

But no one gets a second chance to live
I guess my best bet's to learn how to forgive
And keep giving all that I know how to give
And hope to god that it's enough

And give myself some room to grow outside
These tiny boxes of my mind
Where the soldier leaves this war behind, and me I offer him my prayer
That he'll learn to see, aren't we all beautifully impaired