Fat Sweaty Betty Lyrics

Why, why, why don't you go into the next room
and start gettin' undressed?
What's your pleasure
Why don't you go into the next room
and start gettin' undressed?
What, what, what's your pleasure?

Fat sweaty Betty, the bitch ain't nothin' new.
Her mom used to babysit me, back when we was two.
We'd go to the playground and to the skating-rink,
And we'd go under the bleachers and she'd let me hit the stank.
Well uh, she moved across town and never came back.
Until the other day, I seen her at the chicken shack.
She said her name was, "Betty" I can't believe this shit,
My sexy little girl is now a fat sweaty Bitch! (Fat Sweat Betty)
She said, "Hey J, tell me how you've been?"
She had a piece of chicken-gizzard stuck to her chin.
I told her, "Hold still!" and flicked it off her face, and said,
"Betty, oh Betty! Whatcha say we leave this place?"
I took her back to my crib and hit it, all night.
I let my fingers run across her rippled cellulite.
Eww! It was nasty, but I don't let it bother me.
She rolled over, fuckin' knocked the wind outta me. (Fat Sweaty Betty)
I couldn't breathe, she wouldn't stop. I'm almost dead.
I took a lamp, and bust it on her fuckin' head.
We got dressed, I gave her little kiss good-bye.
Fat sweaty Betty, my fat sweaty pumpkin-pie.

Fat sweaty betty, tell me when you're ready.
(Why don't you go into the next room and start gettin' undressed?)
(2x)

(Fat Sweaty Betty) Fat sweaty Betty "Big, fat, slop of shit"
People called Betty. Flabs of fat on her back and neck, sweaty.
Boogers runnin' out her nose, all over her lips.
Can't tell the difference from her titties to her hips.
But both are in, 'cause I wanna see the neden.
I had to see the cat, the cheesy-chinny-chin.
Rode my bike to her house. Eh, yo Betty let me in!
I'm packin' some snack cakes, Bitch let me in!
(Fat Sweaty Betty) I can hear her comin' down the stairs,
She opened up the door in her muthafuckin' underwears! Eww!
Shit, fuck that! I'm turnin' back, but no, the door's shut
And she goin' for the cake snack. I said, "Relax ho, I'm here on business!
You can have the candy, first you gotta wait a bit." I need a favor.
C'mon Betty, drop them drawers. Ahhh! I knew it! Betty had balls!
(Fat Sweaty Betty) Oh no, here come that ass from the top of the dresser
With the Yokozuna splash. I wish I never came, oh boy do I wish,
She fat sweaty Betty. The sweaty-back Bitch!

Fat sweaty Betty, tell me when you're ready (continuing)
I know you like spaghetti, I know you like spaghetti,
so tell me when you're ready, baby. I know you like spaghetti,
I know you like spaghetti, so tell me when you're ready, baby.
Tell me when you're ready, tell me when you're ready for a
Cheeseburger, pizza pie, T.V. dinner, chicken, baby!
I gets it all, I gets it all for you, baby! I work at Farmer Jack
On the dinner floor, baby! I bring it home, I cook it in the microwave.
I'll feed it to you, just let me get some sticky-steak. 'Cause I don't care,
I wanna hit the cellulite, I hit the cellulite for a turkey pipple pie.
'Cause I don't care, you know I'm not afraid to cook.
Take off your shoes, and let me lick your dirty foot.
I rub you down, I rub you down the right way.
I hear a buzzer, apple pies in the microwave.
I work at Farmer Jack, I work at A & P,
And yes I know my heavy baby wanna be with me.
You wanna be with me, you wanna be with me.
You want some chili-cheese fries and a hoagie.
I should wait, wait 'til the time is right.
Let me count the purple bubbles in your cellulite.
You want some Burger King? You want some Hungryjack?
You want some Jelly beans? You want a Scooby snack?
You want some Dominoes? You want a Milky Way?
You gotta kick it to the Sugar-daddy, Violent J.
You want some Lucky Charms? You want some mashed potatoes?
Let me hit the skins now, and I'll feed you later.
Because I know, I know you want a lunchable.
Somethin' crunchable, somethin' munchable.
How 'bout some Taco Bell? How 'bout a pizza slice?
How 'bout some chicken fingers and a bowl of minute rice?