Lyrics to First Past The Post
They call it first past the post
You live in a constituency
Kinda like an area code
There are 650 of these
Various zones
Up and down the country designed to compartmentalise votes
Check the system
Listen
The prime ministerial candidate with the most votes don’t always win in this system
Our votes only count towards helping some random politician in our local jurisdiction better his position
Come closer
Listen ere
Only takes a third of the population to give a party the majority they need to win
Even if more people in total across the UK
I.E the real majority vote against them getting in
Yeah the systems kinda fucked and it doesn’t seem fair
But that’s the way it is here and also over there
In the USA where the air’s already turned sour
Cause more people voted for Hillary but Trump still got into power
But check the loophole
It’s called tactical voting
If you live in an area where most of your neighbours are a mix of blue and red and are practically neck to neck in the polling
And the yellow party are the party you’ve invested all in your hopes in
And your vote will probably be in vain
I know this sounds insane
And probably makes you feel like you’d do better if you just abstain
And didn’t vote for no one
Like ‘fuck ‘em they all the same’
No one represents me or my peoples anyways
But what if one party is the best of a bad bunch, and you’d rather them get into power than those other lying cunts
What then? Think practically
The only way of ensuring the worst don’t happen is by voting tactically
I.E voting for the party you hate least so the one you hate most don’t just win automatically
In the past this has worked with those of you liberals in the centre who’ve voted pragmatically
Accepting things the way they are without trying to change them dramatically
Cause you know you’ll lose systematically
We’re living in different times now, unprecedented
Trump and his daughter political system no matter how demented and augmented can be dented
You ain’t gotta go out and vote the same way your family and friends did
So go on roll the dice and play the game
Not all constituencies are the same
Some are red, some are blue and some are altogether strange mixes of the two that hang in the balance
And you might do well by putting your X up on that ballot
Throw some seasoning in that salad
Just try and swing it hope your party win it
That seat in the commons still has some value in it
Even if your party ain’t running government they can have a voice within it
Veto policies they don’t agree with
They’re the party in control of trying to pass through and get them beated, like when Boris tried to provo parliament and got defeated
Fuck how you want to live now
This is about how you want to move forward
What kind of future you want for your sons and your daughters
And all you OAP’s out there
The ones that are probably going to die in the next 10 years anyway
Why don’t you ask your fifteen, sixteen year old grandkids who they’d vote for if they could and go vote for them
Your generations already fucked up the environment for them
How about not fucking up their futures for them aswell?
On your marks, get set, go
First past the post
That’s what they call the system we use in this country when we vote
Cameron said that Britain’s broke
But the only thing that’s broke in Britain is the system, trust me, it’s a fucking joke
Just a two horse race like Lidl and Aldi
Fuck where you do your Christmas shopping man
All they wanna know is you an innie or an outie
They don’t wanna see your belly button man
You don’t wanna live to regret this
Second chance to stay or head for the exit
Obviously I’m talkin about Brexit
Yeah that’s right we’re all still talking about Brexit
This ain’t no super complex shit, it’s simple
Fuck how these politicians flexin’
Trying to make this shit about their parties policies
When ain’t nothing moving forward til this problems been corrected
So vote Tory if you want to be free from European influence and become the 51st state of the US when it comes to trading
Or vote Labour and have another referendum on whether we leave the EU now that everyone’s more informed about the situation
If you’re worried about Jeremy stifling wealth creation and don’t wanna vote for Boris cause you fucking hate him
Then vote lib dem in the consistencies they have a realistic stake in
Or the green party, I hear some of you shoutin
Respect if that’s where you stand your ground in
Or any of the other smaller independent parties in the areas they have some actual clout in and force a hung parliament
So no mother fucker has the majority and we get another coalition government
The choice is yours
Vote with your head and your heart in equal measures
Now that you’re better informed
Take your vote and
Go and ruffle some fuckin feathers
Oh and merry Christmas
What’s at the top of your wish list?
Apart from wrapping up this whole dirty stinking business
Go out and get voting
After that you can get the smoke in and crack the tins open
Cause you need a clear head for what’s approaching, no joking
Trust me the games wide open, you know what to do
Hit the likes on this bitch, it needs promoting
You live in a constituency
Kinda like an area code
There are 650 of these
Various zones
Up and down the country designed to compartmentalise votes
Check the system
Listen
The prime ministerial candidate with the most votes don’t always win in this system
Our votes only count towards helping some random politician in our local jurisdiction better his position
Come closer
Listen ere
Only takes a third of the population to give a party the majority they need to win
Even if more people in total across the UK
I.E the real majority vote against them getting in
Yeah the systems kinda fucked and it doesn’t seem fair
But that’s the way it is here and also over there
In the USA where the air’s already turned sour
Cause more people voted for Hillary but Trump still got into power
But check the loophole
It’s called tactical voting
If you live in an area where most of your neighbours are a mix of blue and red and are practically neck to neck in the polling
And the yellow party are the party you’ve invested all in your hopes in
And your vote will probably be in vain
I know this sounds insane
And probably makes you feel like you’d do better if you just abstain
And didn’t vote for no one
Like ‘fuck ‘em they all the same’
No one represents me or my peoples anyways
But what if one party is the best of a bad bunch, and you’d rather them get into power than those other lying cunts
What then? Think practically
The only way of ensuring the worst don’t happen is by voting tactically
I.E voting for the party you hate least so the one you hate most don’t just win automatically
In the past this has worked with those of you liberals in the centre who’ve voted pragmatically
Accepting things the way they are without trying to change them dramatically
Cause you know you’ll lose systematically
We’re living in different times now, unprecedented
Trump and his daughter political system no matter how demented and augmented can be dented
You ain’t gotta go out and vote the same way your family and friends did
So go on roll the dice and play the game
Not all constituencies are the same
Some are red, some are blue and some are altogether strange mixes of the two that hang in the balance
And you might do well by putting your X up on that ballot
Throw some seasoning in that salad
Just try and swing it hope your party win it
That seat in the commons still has some value in it
Even if your party ain’t running government they can have a voice within it
Veto policies they don’t agree with
They’re the party in control of trying to pass through and get them beated, like when Boris tried to provo parliament and got defeated
Fuck how you want to live now
This is about how you want to move forward
What kind of future you want for your sons and your daughters
And all you OAP’s out there
The ones that are probably going to die in the next 10 years anyway
Why don’t you ask your fifteen, sixteen year old grandkids who they’d vote for if they could and go vote for them
Your generations already fucked up the environment for them
How about not fucking up their futures for them aswell?
On your marks, get set, go
First past the post
That’s what they call the system we use in this country when we vote
Cameron said that Britain’s broke
But the only thing that’s broke in Britain is the system, trust me, it’s a fucking joke
Just a two horse race like Lidl and Aldi
Fuck where you do your Christmas shopping man
All they wanna know is you an innie or an outie
They don’t wanna see your belly button man
You don’t wanna live to regret this
Second chance to stay or head for the exit
Obviously I’m talkin about Brexit
Yeah that’s right we’re all still talking about Brexit
This ain’t no super complex shit, it’s simple
Fuck how these politicians flexin’
Trying to make this shit about their parties policies
When ain’t nothing moving forward til this problems been corrected
So vote Tory if you want to be free from European influence and become the 51st state of the US when it comes to trading
Or vote Labour and have another referendum on whether we leave the EU now that everyone’s more informed about the situation
If you’re worried about Jeremy stifling wealth creation and don’t wanna vote for Boris cause you fucking hate him
Then vote lib dem in the consistencies they have a realistic stake in
Or the green party, I hear some of you shoutin
Respect if that’s where you stand your ground in
Or any of the other smaller independent parties in the areas they have some actual clout in and force a hung parliament
So no mother fucker has the majority and we get another coalition government
The choice is yours
Vote with your head and your heart in equal measures
Now that you’re better informed
Take your vote and
Go and ruffle some fuckin feathers
Oh and merry Christmas
What’s at the top of your wish list?
Apart from wrapping up this whole dirty stinking business
Go out and get voting
After that you can get the smoke in and crack the tins open
Cause you need a clear head for what’s approaching, no joking
Trust me the games wide open, you know what to do
Hit the likes on this bitch, it needs promoting
