How Could I Lyrics

I could've been more indignant
You were drunk when we did it
Guess I thought I'd feel older
If I just got it over with
[?]
18 year old [?]
Think I already loved you
I should've known better
But how could I? Mhmm

Don't know what to believe in
Scared that I didn't mean it
Scared you'll end up on speed dial
Or end up in silverlake
[?] or take me
Say I've been thinking lately
Pretty sure that you hate me
And you'll laugh it off
And say how could I? Mhmm

Tell me what feels the most broken
Is it your heart or your ego?
You can say it out loud
Get out in the open
I hеard you've been smoking
Scared to death and still hoping
That I'll comе to my senses
Let down my defenses
But how could I? Mhmm
How could I? Mhmm
How could I? Mhmmm