Now Ruin Is Lyrics

Cushioned by an alliance of malfunction and ridicule,
as days count down and friends rust from exposure to exposure,
I'm realizing that i am the waste of reason,
clean and serene, the dirtiest being,
I'm the alchemist in reverse, i lost all i was,
and i never felt this sick, bellyfull of rocks, rise to throat, this image never looked uglier, i'm not fooling anyone, neither earth nor sky will grant, i would love for it to end, misplaced my childhood, overlooked inertia,
this piercing stare holds more than lies,
i've now married the thought, this is not just ink on paper now drenched in life's blood,
now drenched in life's bitter blood,
stagnant relation of space and self,
staggering toward my ruination,
these are all just actions to entertain the eye,
hell of a screenplay, who i am?
empty arms, make me a leper, now ruin is my skill,
i will never be happy, i would die to hide,
try to find a shortcut to love.