Only Straight Girls Wear Dresses Lyrics

"Only straight girls wear dresses," It read upon the stall
While the dyke who wrote it must not have a brain at all
I got all perturbed, yes, I got mighty mad
At all the assumptions made about my clad

So I left the ladies' lounge in a cloud of perfume
When I saw the same gal who vandalized the bathroom
She looked at me from across her foamy brew
Checked out my hot pants and fancy hair-dew
I saw a spark of interest in her half closed eyes
So I moseyed over to her feeling sex between my thighs

I said, "You're kinda cute with hidden zeal"
She turned to me and said, "Hey, are you for real?"
"Only straight girls wear dresses," it read in her eyes
If I had been in my Levi's
She'd be quick to lick
But because I'm in a mini-skirt, she thinks I suck toe-dick

So I flicked my Bic and lit my self an Ultra Slim
I said, "One date with me, you'll never be the same again"
She said, "You think you know about a women's pleasure?"
"Hun, what I know is too much to measure..."

I grabbed her chin
She gave a slight grin
I said, "Bitch I'm not a talent scout
If you fuck with me, I'm gonna wear you out..."
She said, "I've never been one to back down from a dare
I'll see what you're made of anytime, anywhere."

"Then get your fat butt off that bar seat
I'm not gonna do you where all can see...
You screamin' under my hand
Your entire body under my command."
She followed my tail back to the room of sin
Where her dream-come-true was about to begin

I got both hands into her tight-waist band
Our eyes were locked and that's where I began
I slammed her firmly up against the wall
Undid her buttons so her jeans could fall
Tugged on the snaps of her black leather vest
Low and behold I found two fine breasts

I began to shiver but I played it cool
"Don't let them see you sweat," is my golden rule
I had a crush on this girl since two months ago
But to a dish like me, she was stone cold...
Putty in my hands; she was what I was kissing
Only now what she find out what she'd been missing

I took her mouth; it was hot and wet
While my hands roamed, she was loosing her façade
Her pussy was dripping and I heard her say, "Please"
So I whipped out my latex and went between her knees
Her legs squeezed me tight, she could not resist
Meanwhile I wondered how she'd feel around my fist

I ate her up like a ripe, fresh mango
Her butt was jerkin' like a double-time tango
She's breathing hard and clawing at my head
Could she come standing up or should I pull her down instead?
This girl was wet with sweat and lust, I could see
I began to wonder what she would do for me
She began to drool and I heard a loud wail
Then she came with a tremor that measured on the Rhictor Scale

"Only straight girls wear dresses" glared in red above her head
As she stared at me with surprise and respect
"Now before you eat me, you better eat those words..."
She grabbed me by the neck and the rest is a blur.

(Merci à Camille pour cettes paroles)