Return to Camp Granada Lyrics

Hello muddah, hello faddah
I am back at Camp Grenada
And I'm writing you this letter
Just to say my compound fracture's getting better

No one here knows where my trunk is
And my bunk is where the skunk is
But the food here is improving
'Cause the little black things in it are not moving

Our camp nurse is quite a swimmer
She says swimming makes you slimmer
Her name's Mrs. Pellagrini
Have you ever seen a whale in a bikini?

All our bathrooms have such thin doors
Gee I'd wish they'd move them indoors
We're all tired of mother goose here
So next Friday night they're having Lenny Bruce here

Let me stay, oh muddah, faddah let me stay
I love Grenada every night the campfire's really keen
Oh ma please send some unguintine

Let me stay, up here in muddah nature's land
And tiptoe through the tulips grand
To leave would be a shame
Besides, I'd miss the poker game

Please don't worry, faddah, muddah
I'll take care of little bruddah
He plays ball here and he rows here
And I hope they teach him how to blow his nose here

He wakes up half past six hand
Goes directly to the quicksand
He was lonely, now he's better
He's like all of us except his bed is wetter