The Ball Of Kerrymuir Lyrics

Four-and-twenty virgins come down from Inverness

And when the Ball was over there were four-and-twenty less



Singin' balls to your partner

Your ass against the wall

If ya never been had on a Saturday night

Ya never been had at all



There was doin' in the parlor

There was doin' on the stones,

But ya couldn'ta hear the music for the wheezin' and the groans



Singin' balls to your partner

Your ass against the wall

If ya never been had on a Saturday night

Ya never been had at all



The undertaker he was there all wrapped up in a shroud

Swingin' from the chandelier and peein' on the crowd



Singin' balls to your partner

Your ass against the wall

If ya never been had on a Saturday night

Ya never been had at all



The village cripple he was there

Ah he could not do much

So he lined the ladies against the wall and he did 'em with his crutch,



Singin' balls to your partner

Your ass against the wall

If ya never been had on a Saturday night

Ya never been had at all



Miss Mary McPherson was standin' way up front

Some posies in her hand and a carrot in her...



Singin' balls to your partner

Your ass against the wall

If ya never been had on a Saturday night

Ya never been had at all



The village postman he was there

But the poor man had the pox

He could not do the lassies so he did the letter box



Singin' balls to your partner

Your ass against the wall

If ya never been had on a Saturday night

Ya never been had at all



The Village Magician he was there

He gave us all a laugh

He pulled his foreskin over his head and he vanished up his ass



Singin' balls to your partner

Your ass against the wall

If ya never been had on a Saturday night

Ya never been had at all