The Clam Lyrics

I found a clam beside the sea inside a seedy sack.
I said to the clam,
"Dear sir or ma'am, allow me to call you Jack
Will you come home with me for a cup of tea
And maybe a midnight snack?
For I have some nice Tobasco sauce
To pour upon your back."

I put the clam in a big brass pot
And I boiled a burbling brew,
And his green eyes gleamed
And he steamed and steamed
And he grew... and grew... and GREW...
He was oh so small -- now he's nine feet tall
And I'm feeling rather blue
'Cause he's pouring Tabasco sauce on MY back...
Now what do you think he'll do?!