The Dirtiest Song That Ain't Lyrics

I've been 'round for a long time.

And I learned along the way if you wanna go on the radio, there are words you just can't say.

Well, I thought hard about it and I found a way around it.



Help me go on the radio.

You gotta say the words I can't.

You got to sing along to make this song the dirtiest song that ain't.

Come on, ma'am, won't you give me your hand and say the words I can't?

You got to sing along to make this song the dirtiest song that ain't.



Down in Carolina, I met a girl with a nice...

So I reached down between us and I whipped out my...

Skipped right past the suckin' and got right down to...

She turned and said, "I gotta ask, would you slip it into my...?"



Help me go on the radio.

You gotta say the words I can't.

You got to sing along to make this song the dirtiest song that ain't.

Come on, ma'am, won't you give me your hand and say the words I can't?

You got to sing along to make this song the dirtiest song that ain't.



Her husband was a trucker.

He was a filthy mother...

I didn't wanna wrassle with this no-good, stinkin'...

I heard him come through the kitchen door when I was bangin' his filthy...

I knew I'd end up in a ditch if he caught me ridin' his...



Help me go on the radio.

You gotta say the words I can't.

You got to sing along to make this song the dirtiest song that ain't.

Come on, ma'am, won't you give me your hand and say the words I can't?

You got to sing along to make this song the dirtiest song that ain't.



"Mercy, please!" I told him, but he grabbed me by the...

And he did something heinous - he exposed his...

I said, "I don't mean to seem crass, but why are you buttering up your..."

He said, "My wife's a beard and she lured you here 'cause I'm queer and I love it in the..."



Help me go on the radio by saying the words I can't.

You have to sing along to make this song the dirtiest song that ain't.

Sir and ma'am, thanks for lending a hand by saying the words I can't.

You have to sing along to make this song the dirtiest song, the filthiest song.

The dirtiest song that ain't.