Turn Off the Hubble Lyrics

They put a telescope in outer space
So Mother Earth could look about her space
And what she saw was rather shocking
It was Stephen Hawking
And he was talking 'bout expanding
Universal understanding

And that telescope
Forced her to contemplate as well as cope

With cosmological conjecture
And how that affects yer
Morning commute

And faced with this dilemma, I ask you
What on earth's a Mother Earth to do?

Turn off the Hubble
Stay out of trouble
Live in a bubble
With Barney Rubble

Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum!

We'll pull the plug and watch it plummet down
No need to shoot, we'll simply dumb it down

Before it spoils our education
With information
And fills our heads up with a lotta
That erroneous errata
More importantly, we got a

Brand new paradigm
NASA is singing, "Can you spare a dime?"

And there's a starving astrophysicist
We don't need his assis-
Tence anymore.

'Cause from now on we spell intelligence
With a silent S-C-I-E-ence

Turn off the Hubble
Stay out of trouble
Live in a bubble
With Barney Rubble

Turn off the Hubble
Live in a bubble
Like Barney Rubble
'Cept only double

Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum!

Now, Gallileo
Went way over his head
That's what they said
When he was excommunicated

He was a menace
To Genesis, they say
And to this day
We say to that Yea, verily, yea

And so we sent the president a list
Of every brilliant fundamentalist

Which some might call oxymoronical
Like the Times and Chronicle
And all them eggheads at the college
With degrees in Big Bang-ology
They ought to just apologetically acknowledge that

Our destiny
Is manifestly Charleton Heston-y

Let's saddle up and send a man to Mars
Where better than to Mars?
The planet from
Which some
Would tell us men have come

And incidentally, we've discovered that
An expanding universe makes us look fat

Turn off the Hubble
Stay out of trouble
Live in a bubble
With Barney Rubble

Turn off the Hubble
Live in a bubble
Like Barney Rubble
'Cept only double

Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum Double-U!

Yes, given half a mind, you know the Shrub'll
Turn off the Hubble!